Nursefriendly.com: Jocularity

Showing posts with label Jocularity. Show all posts

Monday, June 20, 2011

Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor

10. I love to wear white support hose.
9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors.
8. It's more challenging than brain surgery.
7. I get free latex gloves.
6. The scrubs are so flattering to my figure.
5. The world doesn't need any more lawyers.
4. I actually like vending machine food.
3. Somebody has to train the residents.
2. I get to spend the holidays with my friends... at work.
1. I always wanted to say, "This won't hurt a bit."
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Saturday, April 23, 2011

Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor

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To subscribe, send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com
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10. The man who snuck in three cats to visit his asthmatic mother.
9. The visitor who ate all his father's food, then rang the nurse to say that the patient was still hungry and needed another tray.
8. The wife who asked you to take her stroked-out husband to the bathroom whenever SHE really was the one who had to go.
7. The son who emptied his mother's colostomy bag into the wastebasket.
6. The husband who fell asleep in the patient's bed while his wife was in the bathroom.
5. The wife who discontinued her husband's central line herself, because “John likes to sleep on his right side.”
4. The 80 year-old daughter of the 98 year old man, who kept turning off her father's continuous gastric feeding because, "He never eats this much a home."
3. The children of one patient who insisted upon using their mother's portable IPPB machine as a scooter in the hallway.
2. The husband who kept sneaking in chocolates for his newly diagnosed diabetic wife.
1. The man who never actually visited his mother, but called twelve times every shift to criticize the nurses, the doctors, the food, and anything else that came to mind.
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Five Minutes
A hospital posted a notice in the nurse's lounge saying: "Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous." Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty risky, too."
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Peek-A-Boo
The famous female Olympic skier, Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo), is not just an outstanding athlete, she is also a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.
She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU."
(Please note, this is in fact an urban legend as verified by "snopes.com" we'll keep it here for clarification anyhow.)
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Interns think of God, residents pray to God, doctors talk to God, nurses ARE God.
The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off duty.
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A Routine Physical, Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor:"A man goes to a doctor for a routine physical. The nurse starts with the basics. "How much do you weigh?" she asks."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/physical
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A Small Prick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:"About a week ago I broke my ankle (in three places) and was in the hospital for several days. My first night in the hospital, after having surgery to rejoin my bones with pins and plates and such, I was in a great deal of pain and quite immobile."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prick
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How Nurses Do It, Nursing Jokes, Occupation Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/
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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went
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Able To Play? Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor:"A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/play
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Charge Nurse & The Genie Who Granted Three Wishes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/charge/
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Getting Even, Nursing Jokes, Physician Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/getting/
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HMO Blues, Nursing Jokes, Managed Care (HMO) Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/blues
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Medical Office Bartering, Nursing Cartoons, Medical Comics, Doctor Jokes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/bartering/
Categories: Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/bedside/
Doctor Jokes, Medical, Patient, Hospital Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical/
HMO Jokes, Health Maintenance Organization Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/hmo/
Nursing Cartoons, Medical Comics, Healthcare , http://www.nursinghumor.com/cartoons/
On The Job Jokes, Employment Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/employment/

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New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor:"A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/password
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Patient Reassurance, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/reassurance
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Practical Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Doctor Jokes
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-nursing-humor-practical-jokes.html
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Respiratory Assessments, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-respiratory-assessments.html
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Get Well Quick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Law Enforcement Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-get-well-quick.html
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Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."
9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases
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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into
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Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend
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Black Testicles, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Care Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor.black.testicles.htm
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The Center of Attention, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.the.center.of.attention.htm
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Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst
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Patient Guidelines And Responsibilities, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/
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Ambulances As Medical Necessities, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:"These are all GENUINE replies from patients asked why they needed an ambulance to and from hospital..."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/ambulances
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The Foley Insertion, Foley Catheter Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/insertion
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Nurse Hell, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Nurse Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hell
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How Many Nurses Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb? Bedside Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/how.many.nurses.does.it.take.to.change.a.light.bulb.htm
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Multiple Specimens, Medical Jokes, Doctor & Patient Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.multiple.specimens.htm
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The Ranks of a Hospital, Nursing Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/the.ranks.of.the.hospital.htm
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Most Commonly Used Phrases By Nurses, Bedside Nursing Humor, Nurse Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/most.commonly.used.phrases.by.nurses.htm
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Caffeine Is My Shepherd, Bedside Nursing Humor, Employment Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/caffeine
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Top Ten Reasons To Date A Nurse! Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"White scrubs are see through. We asses all areas of the body. Scrubs make for easy access."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/date
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Send a blank e-mail to: nursefriendlynotes-subscribe@topica.com
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Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor, Jokes to make you laugh and smile all day.
Send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com
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http://www.inspirationalnursing.com

The Uniform Resource Locator (URL) or Internet Street Address of this page is
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Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Friday, April 1, 2011

This Page is Part of The Nursefriendly National Nursing A To Z & Consumer Health Directories
We are Incorporated in The State of New Jersey, under the name:
Nursefriendly, Inc.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua, New Jersey (NJ) 08051
Our Phone #: 856-415-9617

This website Is © Copyright 1997 - 2011, Andrew Lopez, RN, Nursefriendly, Inc. Please contact us for permission to reproduce.

Other products and companies referred to herein are trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective companies or mark holders, and are not owned or affiliated with Nursefriendly, Inc. or any of it's affiliated companies.

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Monday, April 4, 2011

10 humorous reasons I knew I was a nurse, Scrubsmag.com

The day you start nursing school your life changed permanently. There is the life ‘before nursing’ and then life as a nurse. Two very different worlds.
Here are some of the ways I knew my life had changed when I became a nurse.

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Monday, March 21, 2011

The Top Ten Reasons . . Jokes and Nursing Humor on: The Nursefriendly

New!
Top 10 Qualities of a Great Nurse, NursingLink.com:"Nurses are pretty amazing. Great nurses aren't just compassionate and kind — they have all the medical smarts of a doctor too! Plus, a career as a nurse offers a sense of personal satisfaction that you just can't beat."
http://nursinglink.monster.com/careers/articles/5019-top-10-qualities-of-a-great-nurse?utm_source=nlet&utm_content=nl_c1_20100525_greatnurse#
Categories:
Advanced Practice Nurses (APNs), http://www.4nursing.com/apn
Licensed Practical Nurses (LPNs), Licensed Vocational Nurses (LVNs), http://www.nursefriendly.com/lpn
Male Nurses, Men In Nursing, http://www.nursefriendly.com/male/
Nursing Profession, About The, http://www.nursefriendly.com/profession
Registered Nurses (RNs)http://www.nursefriendly.com/rn/
Traits & Qualities That Make Nurses Excellent Entrepreneurs, http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com/qualities
Traveling Nurses, Travel Nursing Agencies, http://www.4travelnursing.com
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To subscribe, send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com
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Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."
9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases
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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went
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Top Ten Dog Pet Peeves With Humans, Pet Jokes, Animal Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humans
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Top Ten Lies Told by Paramedics, EMS Jokes, Paramedic Humor:"1. Its not my fault, he kept moving. 2. This might stick a little."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/lies
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Top Ten Reasons Why God Created Eve, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/created
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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into
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Top Ten Reasons To Date A Nurse! Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"White scrubs are see through. We asses all areas of the body. Scrubs make for easy access."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/date
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Top Ten Signs of A Bad Hangover, Top Ten Jokes, Drinking/Bar Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hangover
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Top Ten Signs You Need A New Doctor, Medical Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"- He calls you at two in the morning "just to talk." Instead of rubber surgical gloves he wears oven mitts."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/need
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Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear When Regaining Consciousness, Medical Jokes, Operating Room Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/regaining
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Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear a Dad Say, Parenting Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/say
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Top Ten Subtle Differences Between Nursing School and Hell, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/differences
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Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend
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Top Ten Signs Your Family Might Be Dysfunctional:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dysfunctional
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Top Ten Signs That You Might Be A Frustrated Mom:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/frustrated
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Top Ten Reasons For Becoming An Anesthesiologist, Medical Jokes, Hospital Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/anesthesiologist
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Top Ten Signs You May Be Working For The Wrong Dentist, Top Ten Jokes, Dental Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dentist
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Top Fourteen Things PMS Stands For, Top Ten Jokes, Battle of The Sexes Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/pms
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Top Signs That You Are Broke, Top Ten Jokes, Signs of The Times Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/broke
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Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst
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Top Ten Ways To Tell You're A New Dad, Top Ten Jokes, Parenting Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dad
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Top Ten Reasons To Become A Nurse
http://www.nursinghumor.com/nurse
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Top Ten Worst Prognostic Signs For A Patient In The Emergency Department
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prognostic
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Top Ten Signs of Burn-Out
http://www.nursinghumor.com/burnout/
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Top 10 Things Only Women Understand, Top Ten Jokes & Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/understand
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Top Ten Fatal Things to say when your wife is pregnant, Labor & Delivery Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/fatal
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The 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/daughter
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The Uniform Resource Locator (URL) or Internet Street Address of this page is
http://www.nursinghumor.com/top

Created on August 5, 1999

Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Monday, January 25, 2010

This Page is Part of The Nursefriendly National Nursing A To Z & Consumer Health Directories
We are Incorporated in The State of New Jersey, under the name:
Nursefriendly, Inc.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua, New Jersey (NJ) 08051
Our Phone #: 856-415-9617

This website Is © Copyright 1997 - 2010, Andrew Lopez, RN, Nursefriendly, Inc. Please contact us for permission to reproduce.

Other products and companies referred to herein are trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective companies or mark holders, and are not owned or affiliated with Nursefriendly, Inc. or any of it's affiliated companies.

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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

10 reasons nurses deserve an Oscar

With the Oscars just around the corner, where the members of the entertainment world gather to pat each other on the back, it makes one wonder why nurses don’t have their very own Oscars. After all, many of these awards are handed out to actors who imitate what we do in real life.
In the spirit of recognizing the amazing talents of nurses, we roll out the red carpet here and take a look at 10 reasons why we’re Oscar-worthy.
#1: Nurses have true talent minus the diva attitude.
True talent is a gift, one that is subtle, yet always present. A nurse regularly carries out his duties with confidence, knowledge and good grace in the face of the most difficult or unexpected situations, including code browns.
#2: Nurses have The Look.
We all know nurses who have perfected the showstopping Look. It’s the look that’s thrown in the direction of a petulant attending or a whiny visitor. It can stop a tirade cold in its tracks, scare up documents that were deemed “unavailable” and can make grown men tremble in their boots. A real thriller!

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Sunday, February 20, 2011

Why Men Can't Win, Battle of The Sexes, Jokes & Humor

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If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your ass and find something better.
If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.
If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.
If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive.
If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist pig, you bastard. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination. If she asks you, it's a favor.
If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain. If you don't, you're a slob.
If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful.
If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist. If you're not, you're not ambitious.
If she has a headache, she's tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore, and you must be sleeping around.
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Nursing In The Media, truthaboutnursing.org

ER:"Media products under your influence, particularly the NBC/Warner drama "ER," are harming the profession of 2.7 million American nurses by giving the public an inaccurate and inadequate account of what nurses really do to save and improve lives. Research suggests that "ER" strongly and negatively influences the way children view nursing. These products contribute to the nursing shortage, a public health crisis that threatens millions worldwide."
http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/letters/er/

House, MD:"The main patient in tonight's episode of Fox's House was a nurse who believed that a cat tended to sit with those who were about to die--including, recently, the nurse herself. That may not sound like a promising vehicle for House to improve its abysmal portrayal of nursing. But the show actually presents the nurse as someone with health knowledge. And her search for meaning in faith, for some reason in tragic events, is a real counterpoint to House's cold rationality. Indeed, despite the obvious potential for mockery in the cat angle, the mighty House treats the nurse with considerable respect--he seems to care what she thinks, or at least to find her views unnerving. Of course, the nurse plays no real clinical role in the episode, and no other nurses do either. So the episode suggests, as usual, that physicians provide all important care in hospital settings, including all meaningful psychosocial and physical care. Still, any suggestion that intelligent life resides in a nurse is a welcome departure for House (and for the episode's writer Peter Blake, who also penned a November 2005 House episode that was notable for its physician glorification and its casual contempt for other health professions). Tonight's episode, "Here Kitty," drew 13.1 million U.S. viewers. more... see the relevant film clips... and please join our letter writing campaign!"
http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/letters/house/

Private Practice:"ABC's Private Practice, whose season ends tomorrow, April 30, may be the only broadcast network show with a major nurse character to return next season. In the February 5 episode (Mike Ostrowski's "Acceptance," 13 million U.S. viewers), lone nurse character Dell Parker, who is studying to be a midwife, shows some tentative clinical aptitude and knowledge to go with his boyish eagerness. Under the close supervision of OB/GYN Addison Montgomery, Dell ably performs a vacuum-assisted delivery. Later he haltingly guides the baby's parents toward breastfeeding. Dell also performs an assured solo ultrasound of pregnant psychiatrist Violet Turner, calming her panic attack and eliciting her agreement to his own suggestion that, though he's "not a doctor," he will likely become a "pretty good midwife." The show still condescends to Dell, who is also the office manager/receptionist at the LA clinic where the show is set. In the March 26 episode (Craig Turk's "Do the Right Thing," 10.1 million U.S. viewers),"
http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/letters/pp/

"Scrubs" defines nursing:""Scrubs" defines nursing: it's all about shutting up and following physician "orders. " Tonight's episode of NBC's "Scrubs," which purports to teach nurse Carla Espinosa that nursing is all about doing what physicians tell you, is one of the most virulently anti-nurse prime time television episodes the Center has ever seen. more..."
http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/news/2009/may/06_scrubs.html

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Created on December 1, 1999

Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Monday, January 25, 2010

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Monday, June 20, 2011

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10. I love to wear white support hose.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

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Monday, April 4, 2011

10 humorous reasons I knew I was a nurse, Scrubsmag.com

Monday, March 21, 2011

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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

10 reasons nurses deserve an Oscar

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Why Men Can't Win, Battle of The Sexes, Jokes & Humor

If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.

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