Nursefriendly.com: Nursing Jokes

Showing posts with label Nursing Jokes. Show all posts

Thursday, August 4, 2011

New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor

To subscribe, send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com
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A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system.
Turns out his password has expired automatically and he didn’t have a clue how to reset it.
She asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.
Wanting to embarrass the older nurse manager he told her to enter PENIS.
Without blinking or saying a word she entered the password.
She then almost died laughing at the computer's response:
*** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH****
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Five Minutes
A hospital posted a notice in the nurse's lounge saying: "Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous." Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty risky, too."
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Peek-A-Boo
The famous female Olympic skier, Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo), is not just an outstanding athlete, she is also a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.
She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU."
(Please note, this is in fact an urban legend as verified by "snopes.com" we'll keep it here for clarification anyhow."
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Interns think of God, residents pray to God, doctors talk to God, nurses ARE God.
The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off duty.
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Able To Play? Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor:"A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/play
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Getting Even, Nursing Jokes, Physician Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/getting/
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HMO Blues, Nursing Jokes, Managed Care (HMO) Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/blues
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New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor:"A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/password
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Patient Reassurance, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/reassurance
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Practical Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Doctor Jokes
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-nursing-humor-practical-jokes.html
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Respiratory Assessments, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-respiratory-assessments.html
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Get Well Quick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Law Enforcement Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-get-well-quick.html
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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into
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Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend
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Black Testicles, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Care Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor.black.testicles.htm
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The Center of Attention, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.the.center.of.attention.htm
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Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst
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Patient Guidelines And Responsibilities, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/
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Ambulances As Medical Necessities, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:"These are all GENUINE replies from patients asked why they needed an ambulance to and from hospital..."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/ambulances
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The Foley Insertion, Foley Catheter Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/insertion
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Nurse Hell, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Nurse Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hell
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How Many Nurses Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb? Bedside Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/how.many.nurses.does.it.take.to.change.a.light.bulb.htm
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Multiple Specimens, Medical Jokes, Doctor & Patient Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.multiple.specimens.htm
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The Ranks of a Hospital, Nursing Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/the.ranks.of.the.hospital.htm
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Most Commonly Used Phrases By Nurses, Bedside Nursing Humor, Nurse Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/most.commonly.used.phrases.by.nurses.htm
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Caffeine Is My Shepherd, Bedside Nursing Humor, Employment Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/caffeine
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Harry was in the hospital
http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/88old/urine.47.html
Springtime Planting:
http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/88q2/29609.7.html
Urine Testing:
http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/89q1/sample.169.html

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via nursefriendly.com

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Sincerely,

Andrew Lopez, RN
Nursefriendly, Inc. A New Jersey Corporation.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua New Jersey 08051
http://www.nursefriendly.com info@nursefriendly.com ICQ #6116137
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http://www.nursinghumor.com

Monday, June 20, 2011

Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor

10. I love to wear white support hose.
9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors.
8. It's more challenging than brain surgery.
7. I get free latex gloves.
6. The scrubs are so flattering to my figure.
5. The world doesn't need any more lawyers.
4. I actually like vending machine food.
3. Somebody has to train the residents.
2. I get to spend the holidays with my friends... at work.
1. I always wanted to say, "This won't hurt a bit."
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via nursefriendly.com

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor, Laughter/Smile links on: The Nurse Friendly

About Doug Fletcher, RN and The Journal of Nursing Jocularity

Click Here For Our Newest Jokes

Find Funny Nursing (Bedside Nursing, Medical, more like this . .) Jokes & Humor By Category

Animals
Therapeutic Humor Associations
Attorney & Lawyer, Legal Jokes, Law Humor
Bar
Battle of the Sexes
Bill Clinton Humor, Presidential Jokes
Bedside Nursing Humor
Blonde Jokes, Blond Humor
Brain Teasers
Cartoons and Comics (Nursing & Medical)
Changing A Light Bulb Jokes
Charge Nurse Jokes
Clowning, Clowns, Therapeutic Humor & Comedy Links
Dental Humor
Died and Gone To Heaven, Religious Jokes, Priest & Nun Humor
Divorce Jokes, Ending A Marriage Humor
Emergency Department Jokes, ER Humor
Gallows Humor
General Nursing Humor
Geriatrics, Senior Citizen, Nursing Home Humor
Greeting Cards
Growing Old Jokes
Health Maintenance Organization (HMO) or Managed Care Humor
Inspiration
Joke Mailing Lists
Labor and Delivery, Obstetrics
Law Enforcement Humor, Police Jokes
Lawyer, Attorney & Legal Jokes, Law Humor
Legal Jokes, Attorney & Lawyer, Law Humor
Living With A Nurse, Nursing & Medical Jokes & Humor
Marriage, Matrimony, Wedding
Medical Humor
Medical Terminology
Merry Christmas, X-mas Jokes
Nursing Cartoons and Comics
Nursing Humor Entrepreneurs
Operating Room Humor
Parenting Humor, Jokes About Parents And Children
Pets, Veterinarians
Priest & Nun Humor, Died and Gone To Heaven, Religious Jokes
Psychiatric
Religious Jokes, Priest & Nun Humor, Died and Gone To Heaven
RN, Nurse Jokes, Nursing Humor
School Nursing Jokes, Nursing Student Humor
Speakers Bureaus
Top Ten Reasons Jokes & Humor
Veterinarian Jokes, Pet Humor
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road Jokes
You Might Be A . . . . If"

Watch the latest videos on YouTube.com
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See Also: Brain Teasers, Casinos, Gaming, Entertainment, Dating, Internet Personals, Free Stuff, Freebies, Games, Inspirational Stories, Smiles, Joke Mailing Lists, Movies, Videos, DVDs, Music, MP3s, Online Concerts, Ticket Sales & Tickets, Travel Agencies
Amazon.com Titles:
Best of Nursing Humor: A Collection of Articles, Essays, and Poetry Published in the Nursing Literature by Colleen Kenefick, Amy Y. Young, Amazon.com:"As a student nurse I found this book hysterical!!! The student nursing short stories were so easy to relate to. Finally I realize I am not alone, there are more psycho instructors out there marking papers as if they were Zorro using a red pen, and it is not just our facility that "treats report as if it were classified information, and we don't have proper clearance." A must get for the nurse in your life, or for yourself for humor you can relate to."
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1560530626
I Always Faint When I See a Syringe: Nurse Student Tales by Florence Hardesty (R.N.), Amazon.com:"A former nursing professor writes about her students with affection and humor. She introduces the reader to her favorite patients, the ones whose struggles with mental illness, inspired and illustrated her lectures for a quarter of a century. Hardesty's own experience as a mature returning student should encourage those who seek furthur education."
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0963176919/
Nurstoons the Art of Nursing: A Collection of Nursing Cartoons by Carl Elbing Jr., Amazon.com:"Witty and often-outrageous cartoons depicting professional nursing issues with the humor only a nurse can provide. From the Foreword: Learned theorists say that Nursing is both a science and an art. It is a science because of words like microgram and oophorectomy (trust me, that's how you spell it). It is an art because, well, it takes a lot of creativity to pass out all 0900 meds at 0900 (and a bit of time traveling too). Only a Nurse is professionally prepared to wipe bottoms and differentiate v-tach from SVT. Only a Nurse performs services, many of them lifesaving, which get billed as a room charge. Only a Nurse."
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1929693133/
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Our Favorites:
Is This It? Women & Religious Jokes & Humor
Breastfeeding Technical Support, Medical Jokes, Obstetrics Humor
Deathbed Confession, Gallows Humor
Managed Care Finds Cure for Diabetes; Endocrinologists Take the Plunge
Are You a Graduate Nurse or an Experienced Nurse?
A Dictionary of Dating
Battle of the Sexes
Screening Medical Students
Translating Men, What They Say & What They Really Mean
A Cure For One Man's Stuttering
Ways To Cope With Stress
My Elbow Hurts!
Lawyer's Q & A:
A Question of Trust, Lawyers Jokes, Attorney Humor
Why Men Can't Win, Battle of The Sexes, Jokes & Humor
Battle of the Sexes
Smoking After Sex, Battle of The Sexes, Battle of the Sexes
Nice Place, Huh? Nursing Home, Geriatrics
Top Signs That You Are Growing Old
RXLAUGHS: Any Side Effects? (For Those of You Considering Xenical)
Following Doctor's Orders, Nursing & Medical Jokes
Living With A Nurse, Nursing & Medical Jokes & Humor on: The Nursefriendly
Rectal Foreign Bodies: True Tales and X-rays of foreign objects encountered in Emergency Departments Worldwide.
School Nursing, Nursing & Medical Jokes & Humor on: The Nursefriendly: The Circumcision
The Second Opinion
Two Gifts For Adam & Eve, Battle of The Sexes
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Please Choose from the following:

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Animal Jokes: Dogs, Cats, Elephant, Frog Chickens, Insect World, Other Animals...
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Bar Jokes: Bartenders, Drunks, Walks into a Bar... More...
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Battle of the Sexes: A Dictionary of Dating, Translating Men, What They Say & What They Really Mean, Why Men Can't Win, More Like This. . . .
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Bedside Nursing Humor: Freudian Slip, Graduate Nurse vs. Experienced Nurses, Urine Testing, More Like This. . .
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Brain Teasers: Can You Read This (Doctor's Order), More Like This. . .
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Clowning, Clowns, Therapeutic Humor & Comedy Links: Just Clowning Around, Nola Nurse and Dr. I. Fixem, More Like This. . .
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Dental Humor: A Dentist's Bedtime Story, Do You Have A Dentist Appointment Tomorrow Too?, When Knights Were Bold, More Like This. . .
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Emergency Department Humor: The Candle And The Penis...., Scrotum Self-Repair, More Like This. . . ******************************************************

General Nursing Humor: More Like This. . . ******************************************************

Gender Jokes : Courting, Marriage, Men and Women, In-Laws, One-Liners, More...
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General Jokes: Book Titles, Food, Geriatric, Holidays, Bumper Stickers, Tom Swifties, Moral of the Story, Light Bulbs, More...
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Geriatrics, Senior Citizen, Nursing Home Humor: Nursing Home Humor, Old Men, Senior Citizens, Tough Rules More Like This. . .
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Health Maintenance Organization (HMO) or Managed Care Humor: A Cost Saving Memo, Three Doctors Die And Go To Heaven, Managed Care Finds Cure for Diabetes; Endocrinologists Take the Plunge, More Like This. . .
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Healthcare Jokes: Doctors, Nurses, Pregnancy, Death, More...
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Kid's Jokes: Knock-knock, Animals, Excuse notes, and More...
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Lists Jokes: Top Ten, Lists, Things Not to Say
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Mental Health Jokes, Psychiatric Humor: The Top 10 Indications Your Family May Be Dysfunctional, More like this. . .
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Obnoxious Jokes: Comebacks, Insults and Sarcasm
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Political Jokes: Government, Military, Politicians, More...
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Politically Incorrect Jokes: Blonde Jokes: One-Liners, Shorties ; Redneck Jokes: One-Liners, Shorties
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Professions Jokes: Accountants, Doctors, Lawyers, Nurse, Farmers, Waiters, More...
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Religion Jokes: Priests, Nuns, Heaven, God and Jesus, More...
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School Jokes: College, Teachers, Students, More...
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Sports Jokes: Fishing, Football, Golf, Hunting, Wrestling, More...
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Words of Wisdom Jokes: Bathroom Wisdom, Thoughts to Ponder, Confucius Say....., More...
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Work Place Jokes: Office Humor, Computers, More...
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You Might Be A . . . . . If: You Might Be A Nurse If. . . ., You Might Be A Nurse Midwife If... , More like this. . . .
Rules of The Pit Nursing Humor, Medical Jokes & Humor
The Physician's Mistress, Doctor/Medical Jokes & Humor
The Spinster's Will
Top 10 Things Only Women Understand
HMO Physician Recruitment Pre-Qualification Form
Docisms, What They Say & What They Really Mean
Why We Appreciate Men, A Woman's Perspective
Speeding, Law Enforcement, Police Jokes
A Cost Saving Memo, Managed Care (HMOs) Jokes & Humor:
Are You Hungry, Intravenous Therapy, IV Jokes & Humor:
Three Nurses Die and Go To Heaven
A Short History of Medicine
The Charge Nurse & The Genie Who Granted Three Wishes
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road (Commentary from Clinton to Captain Kirk)
The Top Ten Reasons Jokes
Comedy Central, Seinfeld and more!,

DoctorJokes.net! The funniest doctor jokes around because medical humor is pretty darn funny. Suscribe to our mailing list to recieve updates from doctorjokes.net!"
LLC, Genation
P.O Box 1152 Evans, GA 30809 US
404-822-8195, support@doctorjokes.net
http://www.doctorjokes.net/
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Fun Sites for Nurses:"We have setup this site to help nurses find information, web links and to have a place for a little enjoyment. We value your input, so please sign our guest book, add a joke, register for our contests, suggest a website link and mention our site to your co-workers. Also please visit our sponsors websites by clicking on their banners. We hope you enjoy and find this website useful."
http://www.nursingfun.com/

via nursinghumor.com

Any questions, please drop me a line.

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150,000 + Nurse-Reviewed & Approved Nursing Links

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http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com
http://www.nursingexperts.com

Monday, April 4, 2011

10 humorous reasons I knew I was a nurse, Scrubsmag.com

The day you start nursing school your life changed permanently. There is the life ‘before nursing’ and then life as a nurse. Two very different worlds.
Here are some of the ways I knew my life had changed when I became a nurse.

via scrubsmag.com

Click on the "via" link for the rest of the article.

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Sincerely,

150,000 + Nurse-Reviewed & Approved Nursing Links

Monday, March 21, 2011

The Top Ten Reasons . . Jokes and Nursing Humor on: The Nursefriendly

New!
Top 10 Qualities of a Great Nurse, NursingLink.com:"Nurses are pretty amazing. Great nurses aren't just compassionate and kind — they have all the medical smarts of a doctor too! Plus, a career as a nurse offers a sense of personal satisfaction that you just can't beat."
http://nursinglink.monster.com/careers/articles/5019-top-10-qualities-of-a-great-nurse?utm_source=nlet&utm_content=nl_c1_20100525_greatnurse#
Categories:
Advanced Practice Nurses (APNs), http://www.4nursing.com/apn
Licensed Practical Nurses (LPNs), Licensed Vocational Nurses (LVNs), http://www.nursefriendly.com/lpn
Male Nurses, Men In Nursing, http://www.nursefriendly.com/male/
Nursing Profession, About The, http://www.nursefriendly.com/profession
Registered Nurses (RNs)http://www.nursefriendly.com/rn/
Traits & Qualities That Make Nurses Excellent Entrepreneurs, http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com/qualities
Traveling Nurses, Travel Nursing Agencies, http://www.4travelnursing.com
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To subscribe, send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com
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Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."
9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases
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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went
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Top Ten Dog Pet Peeves With Humans, Pet Jokes, Animal Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humans
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Top Ten Lies Told by Paramedics, EMS Jokes, Paramedic Humor:"1. Its not my fault, he kept moving. 2. This might stick a little."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/lies
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Top Ten Reasons Why God Created Eve, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/created
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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into
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Top Ten Reasons To Date A Nurse! Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"White scrubs are see through. We asses all areas of the body. Scrubs make for easy access."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/date
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Top Ten Signs of A Bad Hangover, Top Ten Jokes, Drinking/Bar Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hangover
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Top Ten Signs You Need A New Doctor, Medical Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"- He calls you at two in the morning "just to talk." Instead of rubber surgical gloves he wears oven mitts."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/need
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Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear When Regaining Consciousness, Medical Jokes, Operating Room Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/regaining
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Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear a Dad Say, Parenting Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/say
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Top Ten Subtle Differences Between Nursing School and Hell, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/differences
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Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend
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Top Ten Signs Your Family Might Be Dysfunctional:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dysfunctional
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Top Ten Signs That You Might Be A Frustrated Mom:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/frustrated
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Top Ten Reasons For Becoming An Anesthesiologist, Medical Jokes, Hospital Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/anesthesiologist
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Top Ten Signs You May Be Working For The Wrong Dentist, Top Ten Jokes, Dental Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dentist
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Top Fourteen Things PMS Stands For, Top Ten Jokes, Battle of The Sexes Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/pms
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Top Signs That You Are Broke, Top Ten Jokes, Signs of The Times Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/broke
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Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst
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Top Ten Ways To Tell You're A New Dad, Top Ten Jokes, Parenting Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dad
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Top Ten Reasons To Become A Nurse
http://www.nursinghumor.com/nurse
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Top Ten Worst Prognostic Signs For A Patient In The Emergency Department
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prognostic
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Top Ten Signs of Burn-Out
http://www.nursinghumor.com/burnout/
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Top 10 Things Only Women Understand, Top Ten Jokes & Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/understand
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Top Ten Fatal Things to say when your wife is pregnant, Labor & Delivery Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/fatal
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The 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/daughter
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The Uniform Resource Locator (URL) or Internet Street Address of this page is
http://www.nursinghumor.com/top

Created on August 5, 1999

Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Monday, January 25, 2010

This Page is Part of The Nursefriendly National Nursing A To Z & Consumer Health Directories
We are Incorporated in The State of New Jersey, under the name:
Nursefriendly, Inc.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua, New Jersey (NJ) 08051
Our Phone #: 856-415-9617

This website Is © Copyright 1997 - 2010, Andrew Lopez, RN, Nursefriendly, Inc. Please contact us for permission to reproduce.

Other products and companies referred to herein are trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective companies or mark holders, and are not owned or affiliated with Nursefriendly, Inc. or any of it's affiliated companies.

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Sincerely,

150,000 + Nurse-Reviewed & Approved Nursing Links

Saturday, February 26, 2011

10 ways you know there's a male nurse on the unit, Scrubsmag.com

So, how can you tell when there’s a male nurse in the house?
10. The Hoyer lift is thought of as the backup option.
9. Someone at the nurses’ station isn’t wearing a print top.
8. You no longer call Dr. Strong at the first sign of need.
7. You find yourself with a box of gigantic gloves and wonder where the smaller ones went.
6. Conversations based on sports have somehow infiltrated the unit.
5. Somebody left a burger and fries on the table, where you struggle to convince yourself a salad is fulfilling.
4. Patient assignments are frequently changed after you have taken report and made your first round.
3. A patient keeps calling your co-worker “Doctor” regardless of how many times she is corrected.
2. This complaint becomes familiar: “There are no XL gloves here and they were ordered just for me.”
1. Someone left the toilet seat up in the nurses’ lounge restroom.
This list, by Jeffrey Bodurka, RN

via scrubsmag.com

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Thursday, August 4, 2011

New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor

A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor

10. I love to wear white support hose.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor, Laughter/Smile links on: The Nurse Friendly

Monday, April 4, 2011

10 humorous reasons I knew I was a nurse, Scrubsmag.com

Monday, March 21, 2011

The Top Ten Reasons . . Jokes and Nursing Humor on: The Nursefriendly

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Saturday, February 26, 2011

10 ways you know there's a male nurse on the unit, Scrubsmag.com

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