Showing posts with label pharmacy humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pharmacy humor. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Wedding Registry, Pharmacy Jokes, Senior Citizen Humor


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Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, aged 89, are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a drug store. Jacob suggests they go in.

He addresses the pharmacist, "We're about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?"

Pharmacist: "Of course we do."

Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation?"

Pharmacist: "All kinds."

Jacob: "Medication for rheumatism, scoliosis?"

Pharmacist: "Definitely"

Jacob: "How about Viagra?" Pharmacist: "Of course."

Jacob: "Medicine for memory problems, arthritis, jaundice?"

Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety."

Jacob: "What about vitamins, sleeping pills, agarol, antidotes for Parkinson's disease?"

Pharmacist: "Absolutely."

Jacob: "You sell wheelchairs and walkers?"

Pharmacist: "All speeds and sizes."

Jacob says to the pharmacist: "We'd like to register for our wedding gifts here please.

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Sincerely,

Andrew Lopez, RN
Nursefriendly, Inc. A New Jersey Corporation.
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Friday, February 13, 2009

Anal Deodorant, Pharmacy Jokes, Patient Humor

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Did you know, you can download all our jokes? Visit http://www.nursinghumor.com/archive

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Anal Deodorant, Pharmacy Jokes, Patient Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/pharmacy
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A customer walks into a pharmacy and asks assistant for an anal deodorant.

The assistant explains that they don’t stock them. The man insists that he bought his last one from this store.

The assistant passes man on to the pharmacist, who explains that store has never stocked such an item.

The man explains he bought his last one from this store only weeks ago and has done for several years.

The pharmacist asks man to bring in his last purchase and he will try to match the product.

The following day, the man returns to the pharmacy and shows the deodorant to the pharmacist.

The pharmacist asks why the customer thinks this is an anal deodorant, when it is obviously of the underarm stick variety.

The customer explains that instructions on reverse state, "Push up bottom to use."

(They do say the customer is always right, don’t they? ? )

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Five Minutes

A hospital posted a notice in the nurse's lounge saying: "Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous." Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty risky, too."

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Peek-A-Boo

The famous female Olympic skier, Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo), is not just an outstanding athlete, she is also a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.

She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU."

(Please note, this is in fact an urban legend as verified by "snopes.com" we'll keep it here for clarification anyhow.)

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Interns think of God, residents pray to God, doctors talk to God, nurses ARE God.

The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off duty.

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A Routine Physical, Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor:"A man goes to a doctor for a routine physical. The nurse starts with the basics. "How much do you weigh?" she asks."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/physical

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A Small Prick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:"About a week ago I broke my ankle (in three places) and was in the hospital for several days. My first night in the hospital, after having surgery to rejoin my bones with pins and plates and such, I was in a great deal of pain and quite immobile."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prick

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How Nurses Do It, Nursing Jokes, Occupation Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/

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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went

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Able To Play? Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor:"A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/play

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Charge Nurse & The Genie Who Granted Three Wishes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/charge/

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Getting Even, Nursing Jokes, Physician Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/getting/

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HMO Blues, Nursing Jokes, Managed Care (HMO) Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/blues

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New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor:"A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/password

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Patient Reassurance, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/reassurance

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Practical Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Doctor Jokes
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-nursing-humor-practical-jokes.html

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Respiratory Assessments, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-respiratory-assessments.html

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Get Well Quick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Law Enforcement Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-get-well-quick.html

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Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."

9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases

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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into

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Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend

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Black Testicles, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Care Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/bedside.nursing.humor.black.testicles.htm

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The Center of Attention, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.the.center.of.attention.htm

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Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst

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Patient Guidelines And Responsibilities, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/

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Ambulances As Medical Necessities, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:"These are all GENUINE replies from patients asked why they needed an ambulance to and from hospital..."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/ambulances

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The Foley Insertion, Foley Catheter Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/insertion

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Nurse Hell, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Nurse Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hell

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How Many Nurses Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb? Bedside Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/how.many.nurses.does.it.take.to.change.a.light.bulb.htm

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Multiple Specimens, Medical Jokes, Doctor & Patient Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.multiple.specimens.htm

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The Ranks of a Hospital, Nursing Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/the.ranks.of.the.hospital.htm

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Most Commonly Used Phrases By Nurses, Bedside Nursing Humor, Nurse Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/most.commonly.used.phrases.by.nurses.htm

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Caffeine Is My Shepherd, Bedside Nursing Humor, Employment Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/caffeine

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Sincerely,

Andrew Lopez, RN
Nursefriendly, Inc. A New Jersey Corporation.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua New Jersey 08051
http://www.nursefriendly.com info@nursefriendly.com ICQ #6116137, AOL "nursefriendly"
856-415-9617, (fax) 415-9618

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