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10. The man who snuck in three cats to visit his asthmatic mother.
9. The visitor who ate all his father's food, then rang the nurse to say that the patient was still hungry and needed another tray.
8. The wife who asked you to take her stroked-out husband to the bathroom whenever SHE really was the one who had to go.
7. The son who emptied his mother's colostomy bag into the wastebasket.
6. The husband who fell asleep in the patient's bed while his wife was in the bathroom.
5. The wife who discontinued her husband's central line herself, because “John likes to sleep on his right side.”
4. The 80 year-old daughter of the 98 year old man, who kept turning off her father's continuous gastric feeding because, "He never eats this much a home."
3. The children of one patient who insisted upon using their mother's portable IPPB machine as a scooter in the hallway.
2. The husband who kept sneaking in chocolates for his newly diagnosed diabetic wife.
1. The man who never actually visited his mother, but called twelve times every shift to criticize the nurses, the doctors, the food, and anything else that came to mind.
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Five Minutes
A hospital posted a notice in the nurse's lounge saying: "Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous." Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty risky, too."
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Peek-A-Boo
The famous female Olympic skier, Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo), is not just an outstanding athlete, she is also a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.
She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU."
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Interns think of God, residents pray to God, doctors talk to God, nurses ARE God.
The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off duty.
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A Routine Physical, Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor:"A man goes to a doctor for a routine physical. The nurse starts with the basics. "How much do you weigh?" she asks."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/physical******************************************************
A Small Prick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:"About a week ago I broke my ankle (in three places) and was in the hospital for several days. My first night in the hospital, after having surgery to rejoin my bones with pins and plates and such, I was in a great deal of pain and quite immobile."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prick******************************************************
How Nurses Do It, Nursing Jokes, Occupation Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/******************************************************
Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went******************************************************
Able To Play? Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor:"A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/play******************************************************
Charge Nurse & The Genie Who Granted Three Wishes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/charge/******************************************************
Getting Even, Nursing Jokes, Physician Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/getting/******************************************************
HMO Blues, Nursing Jokes, Managed Care (HMO) Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/blues******************************************************
Medical Office Bartering, Nursing Cartoons, Medical Comics, Doctor Jokes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/bartering/
Categories: Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/bedside/
Doctor Jokes, Medical, Patient, Hospital Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical/
HMO Jokes, Health Maintenance Organization Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/hmo/
Nursing Cartoons, Medical Comics, Healthcare , http://www.nursinghumor.com/cartoons/
On The Job Jokes, Employment Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/employment/
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New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor:"A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/password******************************************************
Patient Reassurance, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/reassurance******************************************************
Practical Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Doctor Jokes
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-nursing-humor-practical-jokes.html******************************************************
Respiratory Assessments, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-respiratory-assessments.html******************************************************
Get Well Quick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Law Enforcement Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-get-well-quick.html******************************************************
Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."
9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases******************************************************
Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into******************************************************
Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend******************************************************
Black Testicles, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Care Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor.black.testicles.htm******************************************************
The Center of Attention, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.the.center.of.attention.htm******************************************************
Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst******************************************************
Patient Guidelines And Responsibilities, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/******************************************************
Ambulances As Medical Necessities, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:"These are all GENUINE replies from patients asked why they needed an ambulance to and from hospital..."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/ambulances******************************************************
The Foley Insertion, Foley Catheter Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/insertion******************************************************
Nurse Hell, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Nurse Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hell******************************************************
How Many Nurses Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb? Bedside Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/how.many.nurses.does.it.take.to.change.a.light.bulb.htm******************************************************
Multiple Specimens, Medical Jokes, Doctor & Patient Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.multiple.specimens.htm******************************************************
The Ranks of a Hospital, Nursing Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/the.ranks.of.the.hospital.htm******************************************************
Most Commonly Used Phrases By Nurses, Bedside Nursing Humor, Nurse Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/most.commonly.used.phrases.by.nurses.htm******************************************************
Caffeine Is My Shepherd, Bedside Nursing Humor, Employment Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/caffeine******************************************************
Top Ten Reasons To Date A Nurse! Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"White scrubs are see through. We asses all areas of the body. Scrubs make for easy access."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/date******************************************************
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http://www.nursefriendly.comNursing Jokes, Medical Humor, Jokes to make you laugh and smile all day.
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Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Friday, April 1, 2011
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