Showing posts with label Top Ten Humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Top Ten Humor. Show all posts

Monday, June 20, 2011

Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor

10. I love to wear white support hose.

9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors.

8. It's more challenging than brain surgery.

7. I get free latex gloves.

6. The scrubs are so flattering to my figure.

5. The world doesn't need any more lawyers.

4. I actually like vending machine food.

3. Somebody has to train the residents.

2. I get to spend the holidays with my friends... at work.

1. I always wanted to say, "This won't hurt a bit."

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See also:

New!
10 Greatest Novels for Nurses, February 23rd, 2011, Nursingschools.net:"One great way to escape the pressures and stresses of nursing school or work is to read a great novel. These literary works, featuring nurses and health care facilities, will provide you with a much-needed dose of fun and fantasy while reminding you why you chose the profession in the first place. So if you want to re ignite your passion for nursing or just spend a wonderful evening kicking back, check out one of these amazing novels." http://www.nursingschools.net/blog/2011/02/10-greatest-novels-for-nurses/

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Top 10 Qualities of a Great Nurse, NursingLink.com:"Nurses are pretty amazing. Great nurses aren't just compassionate and kind — they have all the medical smarts of a doctor too! Plus, a career as a nurse offers a sense of personal satisfaction that you just can't beat."
http://nursinglink.monster.com/careers/articles/5019-top-10-qualities-of-a-gr...

Categories:
Advanced Practice Nurses (APNs), http://www.4nursing.com/apn
Licensed Practical Nurses (LPNs), Licensed Vocational Nurses (LVNs), http://www.nursefriendly.com/lpn
Male Nurses, Men In Nursing, http://www.nursefriendly.com/male/
Nursing Profession, About The, http://www.nursefriendly.com/profession
Registered Nurses (RNs)http://www.nursefriendly.com/rn/
Traits & Qualities That Make Nurses Excellent Entrepreneurs, http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com/qualities
Traveling Nurses, Travel Nursing Agencies, http://www.4travelnursing.com

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Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."

9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases

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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went

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Top Ten Dog Pet Peeves With Humans, Pet Jokes, Animal Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humans

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Top Ten Lies Told by Paramedics, EMS Jokes, Paramedic Humor:"1. Its not my fault, he kept moving. 2. This might stick a little."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/lies

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Top Ten Reasons Why God Created Eve, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/created

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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into

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Top Ten Reasons To Date A Nurse! Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"White scrubs are see through. We asses all areas of the body. Scrubs make for easy access."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/date

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Top Ten Signs of A Bad Hangover, Top Ten Jokes, Drinking/Bar Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hangover

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Top Ten Signs You Need A New Doctor, Medical Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"- He calls you at two in the morning "just to talk." Instead of rubber surgical gloves he wears oven mitts."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/need

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Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear When Regaining Consciousness, Medical Jokes, Operating Room Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/regaining

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Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear a Dad Say, Parenting Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/say

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Top Ten Subtle Differences Between Nursing School and Hell, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/differences

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Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend

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Top Ten Signs Your Family Might Be Dysfunctional:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dysfunctional

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Top Ten Signs That You Might Be A Frustrated Mom:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/frustrated

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Top Ten Reasons For Becoming An Anesthesiologist, Medical Jokes, Hospital Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/anesthesiologist

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Top Ten Signs You May Be Working For The Wrong Dentist, Top Ten Jokes, Dental Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dentist

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Top Fourteen Things PMS Stands For, Top Ten Jokes, Battle of The Sexes Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/pms

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Top Signs That You Are Broke, Top Ten Jokes, Signs of The Times Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/broke

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Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst

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Top Ten Ways To Tell You're A New Dad, Top Ten Jokes, Parenting Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/dad

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Top Ten Reasons To Become A Nurse
http://www.nursinghumor.com/nurse

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Top Ten Worst Prognostic Signs For A Patient In The Emergency Department
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prognostic

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Top Ten Signs of Burn-Out
http://www.nursinghumor.com/burnout/

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Top 10 Things Only Women Understand, Top Ten Jokes & Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/understand

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Top Ten Fatal Things to say when your wife is pregnant, Labor & Delivery Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/fatal

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The 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/daughter

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--

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For Health Information you can use, Follow, Connect, Like us on (Most Invites Accepted):
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What's New:
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Blogger:
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Nursing Entrepreneurs, Nurses In Business
http://nursingentrepreneurs.ning.com/

StumbleUpon,
http://www.nursefriendly.com/stumbleupon
******************************************************

Sincerely,

Andrew Lopez, RN
Nursefriendly, Inc. A New Jersey Corporation.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua New Jersey 08051
http://www.nursefriendly.com info@nursefriendly.com ICQ #6116137
856-415-9617, (fax) 415-9618

150,000 + Nurse-Reviewed & Approved Nursing Links

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http://www.inspirationalnursing.com
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http://www.nursingcasestudy.com
http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com
http://www.nursingexperts.com
http://www.nursinghumor.com

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor

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To subscribe, send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com

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10. The man who snuck in three cats to visit his asthmatic mother.

9. The visitor who ate all his father's food, then rang the nurse to say that the patient was still hungry and needed another tray.

8. The wife who asked you to take her stroked-out husband to the bathroom whenever SHE really was the one who had to go.

7. The son who emptied his mother's colostomy bag into the wastebasket.

6. The husband who fell asleep in the patient's bed while his wife was in the bathroom.

5. The wife who discontinued her husband's central line herself, because “John likes to sleep on his right side.”

4. The 80 year-old daughter of the 98 year old man, who kept turning off her father's continuous gastric feeding because, "He never eats this much a home."

3. The children of one patient who insisted upon using their mother's portable IPPB machine as a scooter in the hallway.

2. The husband who kept sneaking in chocolates for his newly diagnosed diabetic wife.

1. The man who never actually visited his mother, but called twelve times every shift to criticize the nurses, the doctors, the food, and anything else that came to mind.

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Five Minutes

A hospital posted a notice in the nurse's lounge saying: "Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous." Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty risky, too."

******************************************************

Peek-A-Boo

The famous female Olympic skier, Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo), is not just an outstanding athlete, she is also a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.

She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU."

(Please note, this is in fact an urban legend as verified by "snopes.com" we'll keep it here for clarification anyhow.)

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Interns think of God, residents pray to God, doctors talk to God, nurses ARE God.

The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off duty.

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A Routine Physical, Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor:"A man goes to a doctor for a routine physical. The nurse starts with the basics. "How much do you weigh?" she asks."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/physical

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A Small Prick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:"About a week ago I broke my ankle (in three places) and was in the hospital for several days. My first night in the hospital, after having surgery to rejoin my bones with pins and plates and such, I was in a great deal of pain and quite immobile."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prick

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How Nurses Do It, Nursing Jokes, Occupation Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/

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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went

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Able To Play? Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor:"A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/play

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Charge Nurse & The Genie Who Granted Three Wishes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/charge/

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Getting Even, Nursing Jokes, Physician Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/getting/

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HMO Blues, Nursing Jokes, Managed Care (HMO) Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/blues

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Medical Office Bartering, Nursing Cartoons, Medical Comics, Doctor Jokes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/bartering/
Categories: Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/bedside/
Doctor Jokes, Medical, Patient, Hospital Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical/
HMO Jokes, Health Maintenance Organization Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/hmo/
Nursing Cartoons, Medical Comics, Healthcare , http://www.nursinghumor.com/cartoons/
On The Job Jokes, Employment Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/employment/

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New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor:"A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/password

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Patient Reassurance, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/reassurance

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Practical Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Doctor Jokes
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-nursing-humor-practical-jokes.html

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Respiratory Assessments, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-respiratory-assessments.html

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Get Well Quick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Law Enforcement Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-get-well-quick.html

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Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."

9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases

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Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into

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Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend

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Black Testicles, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Care Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor.black.testicles.htm

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The Center of Attention, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.the.center.of.attention.htm

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Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst

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Patient Guidelines And Responsibilities, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/

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Ambulances As Medical Necessities, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:"These are all GENUINE replies from patients asked why they needed an ambulance to and from hospital..."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/ambulances

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The Foley Insertion, Foley Catheter Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/insertion

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Nurse Hell, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Nurse Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/hell

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How Many Nurses Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb? Bedside Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/how.many.nurses.does.it.take.to.change.a.light.bulb.htm

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Multiple Specimens, Medical Jokes, Doctor & Patient Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.multiple.specimens.htm

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The Ranks of a Hospital, Nursing Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/the.ranks.of.the.hospital.htm

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Most Commonly Used Phrases By Nurses, Bedside Nursing Humor, Nurse Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/most.commonly.used.phrases.by.nurses.htm

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Caffeine Is My Shepherd, Bedside Nursing Humor, Employment Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/caffeine

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Top Ten Reasons To Date A Nurse! Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:"White scrubs are see through. We asses all areas of the body. Scrubs make for easy access."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/date

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To subscribe to our:

Nurse Friendly Notes Newsletter:

Send a blank e-mail to: nursefriendlynotes-subscribe@topica.com
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Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor, Jokes to make you laugh and smile all day.

Send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com
http://lists.topica.com/lists/nursingjokes/

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Send a blank message to: clinicalnursingcases-subscribe@topica.com
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Send a blank e-mail to: inspirationalstories-subscribe@topica.com
http://www.inspirationalnursing.com

The Uniform Resource Locator (URL) or Internet Street Address of this page is
http://nursinghumor.com/worst

Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Friday, April 1, 2011


This Page is Part of The Nursefriendly National Nursing A To Z & Consumer Health Directories

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For Health Information you can use, Follow, Connect, Like us on (Most Invites Accepted):
http://www.nursefriendly.com/social/

Twitter!
http://www.nursefriendly.com/twitter

Facebook:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/facebook

What's New:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/new/

Blogger:
http://4nursing.blogspot.com/

Linked In:
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http://nursingentrepreneurs.ning.com/

Posterous.com
http://nursefriendly.posterous.com

StumbleUpon,
http://www.nursefriendly.com/stumbleupon
******************************************************

Sincerely,

Andrew Lopez, RN
Nursefriendly, Inc. A New Jersey Corporation.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua New Jersey 08051
http://www.nursefriendly.com info@nursefriendly.com ICQ #6116137
856-415-9617, (fax) 415-9618

150,000 + Nurse-Reviewed & Approved Nursing Links

http://www.4nursing.com
http://www.legalnursingconsultant.com
http://www.nursinghumor.com
http://www.nursefriendly.com
http://www.nursingcasestudy.com
http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com
http://www.nursingexperts.com

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Top 10 Reasons to Become a Nurse, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor

To subscribe send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com

Did you know, you can download all our jokes? Visit http://www.nursinghumor.com/archive

Follow us on Twitter! http://twitter.com/nursefriendly

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Top 10 Reasons to Become a Nurse, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/nurse
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Pays better than McDonald's (though the hours aren't as good.)

Fashionable shoes and sexy uniforms.

Needles: 'tis better to give than to receive.

Confidence in reassuring patients that all bleeding stops ... eventually.

Opportunity to expose yourself to rare, exotic, and exciting new diseases.

Interesting aromas.

Courteous and infallible doctors who always leave clear orders in perfectly clear handwriting.

Enough charting to navigate around the world.

Celebration of holidays with all your friends ... at work.

Comfort in the knowledge that most of your patients survive no matter what you do to them.

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Five Minutes

A hospital posted a notice in the nurse's lounge saying: "Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous." Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty risky, too."

******************************************************

Peek-A-Boo

The famous female Olympic skier, Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo), is not just an outstanding athlete, she is also a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.

She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU."

(Please note, this is in fact an urban legend as verified by "snopes.com" we'll keep it here for clarification anyhow.)

******************************************************

Interns think of God, residents pray to God, doctors talk to God, nurses ARE God.

The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off duty.

******************************************************

A Routine Physical, Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor:"A man goes to a doctor for a routine physical. The nurse starts with the basics. "How much do you weigh?" she asks."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/physical

******************************************************

A Small Prick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:"About a week ago I broke my ankle (in three places) and was in the hospital for several days. My first night in the hospital, after having surgery to rejoin my bones with pins and plates and such, I was in a great deal of pain and quite immobile."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/prick

******************************************************

How Nurses Do It, Nursing Jokes, Occupation Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/

******************************************************

Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Nurse Jokes, Healthcare Humor:"10. I love to wear white support hose. 9. I get a kick out of arrogant doctors."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/went

******************************************************

Able To Play? Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor:"A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/play

******************************************************

Charge Nurse & The Genie Who Granted Three Wishes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/charge/

******************************************************

Getting Even, Nursing Jokes, Physician Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/getting/

******************************************************

HMO Blues, Nursing Jokes, Managed Care (HMO) Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/blues

******************************************************

New Password, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Computer Humor:"A female nurse manager was helping a smug male resident access his computer account on the hospital information system."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/password

******************************************************

Patient Reassurance, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/reassurance

******************************************************

Practical Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Doctor Jokes
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-nursing-humor-practical-jokes.html

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Respiratory Assessments, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-respiratory-assessments.html

******************************************************

Get Well Quick, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Law Enforcement Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-get-well-quick.html

******************************************************

Top Ten Most Commonly Used Nursing Phrases:"10. "No, really, I don't mind changing the TV channel for you . . . again."

9. "I'm sorry, it's not THAT kind of Tylenol."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/phrases

******************************************************

Top Ten Reasons I Went Into Nursing, Top Ten Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/into

******************************************************

Top Ten Reasons To Work An Overtime Shift On The Weekend, Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/weekend

******************************************************

Black Testicles, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Care Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/bedside.nursing.humor.black.testicles.htm

******************************************************

The Center of Attention, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.the.center.of.attention.htm

******************************************************

Top Ten Worst Hospital Visitors, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/worst

******************************************************

Patient Guidelines And Responsibilities, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Patient Humor:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/

******************************************************

Ambulances As Medical Necessities, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor:"These are all GENUINE replies from patients asked why they needed an ambulance to and from hospital..."
http://www.nursinghumor.com/ambulances

******************************************************

The Foley Insertion, Foley Catheter Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/insertion

******************************************************

Nurse Hell, Bedside Nursing Jokes, Nurse Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/nurse

******************************************************

How Many Nurses Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb? Bedside Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/how.many.nurses.does.it.take.to.change.a.light.bulb.htm

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Multiple Specimens, Medical Jokes, Doctor & Patient Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.multiple.specimens.htm

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The Ranks of a Hospital, Nursing Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/bedside.nursing.humor/the.ranks.of.the.hospital.htm

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Most Commonly Used Phrases By Nurses, Bedside Nursing Humor, Nurse Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/most.commonly.used.phrases.by.nurses.htm

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Caffeine Is My Shepherd, Bedside Nursing Humor, Employment Jokes
http://www.nursinghumor.com/caffeine

******************************************************

******************************************************

Sincerely,

Andrew Lopez, RN
Nursefriendly, Inc. A New Jersey Corporation.
38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua New Jersey 08051
http://www.nursefriendly.com info@nursefriendly.com ICQ #6116137, AOL "nursefriendly"
856-415-9617, (fax) 415-9618

150,000 + Nurse-Reviewed & Approved Nursing Links

http://www.4nursing.com
http://www.4studentnurses.com
http://www.4travelnursing.com
http://www.lopez1.com
http://www.nursinga2z.com
http://www.nursingdiscussions.com
http://www.nursinghumor.com
http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com
http://www.nursingexperts.com